Class Reunion

I just got back from my 20 year reunion.  As I was mingling and awkwardly staring at everyone's chest, trying to read their name tag, I realized what everyone was doing.  They are measuring everyone up and playing a big game of "one up."

I started to think that there has to be a better way of determining who wins the reunion.  Obviously, if you went to high school with LeBron James, he wins the reunion every year.  He is clearly the most successful and can "one up" anyone there, but in the real world with a room full of nobodys WHO WINS?  How do you keep score?      I'M GLAD YOU ASKED.

Here is how it works.

1.  You get a series of points based on your life, your job, where you were and where you are.
2.  Remember, most people remember you from 20 years ago, so the bar is only as high as your last meeting.  If you haven't seen anyone since high school, you compare yourself to high school.  If you saw these folks at your 10 year, then that becomes your baseline...get it?
3.  You are measured against societal norms.  Sorry for all of you who are a little different.  You separated yourself from us now be prepared to be judged!  This isn't a right vs. wrong thing, it is just how everyone thinks.  For example, if you graduated with a normal head of hair and you show up at the reunion with a green mohawk, you're going to be judged against the societal norm and your baseline of normal hair...get it?
4.  The higher your number the worse it is.  You want to stay close to zero or negative numbers.
5.  This is highly subjective and I am the law.  There is room for discussion, but I don't update this thing often enough for you to get any sort of change authorized.  Therefore, this scoring system is the law!

Scoring rules:

Rule #1 Who got fat?  You get 1 point for every percent of body weight you gained.  If you were 100 lbs. in high school and you are now 200 lbs. you get 100 points for a 100% increase in weight.  This is pretty self explanatory.  People were used to you being thin and now you are not.  The shock factor can be high and folks will talk about you!

Rule #2  Where do you work?  NOBODY CARES.  Everyone lies about their job anyway.  We aren't smart enough to know that the TPS reports that you create on a daily basis are important or not.  Unless your job is obviously high or low, no points awarded.  This is where LeBron would get all of his points.  Actors, singers, professional athletes, etc. can score big here.  You and I get zilch.

Rule #3  Marriage.

• never married 1 point per reunion after 5 year reunion. (15 points for the class of 1992)
• One spouse, still married (-10) points
• One spouse, divorced 10 points
• One divorce, currently married 8 points
• Two divorces 25 points
• Three divorces 50 points
• 4+ divorces - Just give yourself a big score.

Rule #4 Kids

• Zero kids/single 0 points.  
• Zero kids/married 1 point per year married.  Folks expect you to have kids.
• 1 kid-married (-10 points) 1 kid-single/divorced (-5 points)
• 2 kids-married (-20 points) 2 kids-single/divorced (-10 points) you get -5 points if you have one boy and one girl, since that is what everyone really wants.
• 3 kids-married (-17 points) 3 kids-single/divorced (-7 points).  That's right, you're overpopulating the Earth so your bonus is sinking. +3 points if you have three girls.  Sorry, Darrell, Bryan and Buddy.
• Each kid over 3, just add 5 points/kid to the 3 kid schedule.  I can make allowances for twins...especially the cool kind that look alike!

Rule #5 General

• Gay = 50 points, unless you were gay in High School.  Folks don't like surprises and they will judge you.  If you were always very effeminate as a guy and it really surprises nobody, this can be greatly reduced.  If you are a guy and wore a dress in high school but denied being gay, you could actually lose points on this one because people will be glad that you quit fighting it.  The full 50 is for a total surprise announcement. 
• Live in the same house your grew up in (with mom and/or dad) = 50 points.
• Live in a cool exotic place = various.  I'll make judgments as I hear them.  You get big points if you live at the beach.
• If you get waaay too drunk at the reunion and someone else has to guide you home = 20 points.  Seems harsh, but this is your one impression that will last until your next reunion.
• Baldness (exception: if you have or have had Chemo, you can get a pass)
• Guys - take your percentage of hair loss on top of your head and multiply by .25.  If you are 100% bald on top, you get 25 points. 
• Girls - just give yourself a big score....sorry.

My score is 12.  I ain't ashamed of it!  This was meant to be fun.  If it made you mad, then you get a bunch of points for being an idiot.  This was meant to be a funny jab at societal judging.  If your number is less than 12, then you cheated and give yourself some points for being a cheater!  

St. Louis

About a month ago, my boss called me to inform me that I was going to attend the SDDC (Surface Deployment and Distribuition Command) Traffic Management Workshop in St. Louis. Woo Hoo! I actually tried to talk my way out of it, but one of us needed to go, and he is the boss. As the trip got closer, I realized that there was a chance that the Rangers could be in town for the World Series.

As it turned out, it all fell into place and I happened to be in a city where the World Series was being played with my favorite team. I look up my hotel and it is 2 blocks from Busch Stadium. A very short walk. It's also across the street from the Gateway Arch (Meh).

As the weather got colder, I followed the internet ticket prices and watched them drop and drop. Finally, about an hour before the game started, I walked over to soak up the scene and look for tickets. The first few scalpers were looking to get rich off of me so I just kept on walking. What I noticed was that there were more scalpers than people needing tickets...always a good thing! Finally as the national anthem was being sung, I bought a ticket on the third base side 3rd level. Face value = $215 Paid $80. Couldn't pass it up. When I got to my seat, there were three empty seats all in a row and I sat in the middle. Both arm rests and nobody next to me! Everything was perfect, except the weather and the final score.

I would have bet the house that it was below 40 degrees, but it was between 45-50 degrees, which doesn't sound cold until you add in a steady drizzly and a 20 mph wind. Later the drizzle turned into a light rain...nice! Also, the fact that I was just sitting still and not moving made it so much colder. If I was out jogging, 45 with drizzle is an ideal weather situation. Sitting still in a hard plastic chair makes it cold. I had on a t-shirt, a button down shirt, a hoody - hood on, and a jacket. Overall, I had a blast, and I got to go to a World Series game!

Observations about the game:
1. St. Louis is a baseball town. The whole downtown area is red and white.
2. A downtown stadium is really cool. For some reason, have the stadium in the middle of everything is pretty cool.
3. The ballpark in Arlington puts on a MUCH better show than Busch stadium. I could have napped while at the game, it was so quiet between innings.
4. St. Louis fans are not nearly as into the game as Ranger fans. The only time the crowd got loud was after the two RBI hits and in the top of the ninth inning.
5. St. Louis fans are very cordial. I wore my Ranger jacket and never even got a second look. I've been to plenty of different games as a visiting fan and this is easily the least aggressive crowd toward visiting fans.
6. When it is cold, people don't remove their hats during God Bless America. I did. It was cold, but doesn't seem like too much of a sacrifice!
7. No dot race, no Cotton Eyed Joe, no Deep In The Heart Of Texas?? See #3. All they had was a couple girls and a T-Shirt sling.
8. The squirrel is really stupid. I think Rowdy is better than that squirrel. The claw and antlers is cooler than that squirrel. The Crowley High School eagle is cooler than that dumb squirrel (shout out to D. Loomis)
9. All this, the best part of this trip is going to be the flight home to see my baby!

Greatest Sports Year Ever

For father's day, I got the best gifts. I usually don't ask for anything, because I'm usually satisfied with the things I already have, but the ol' wifey hit the nail on the head this year. I got the following:

Maverick Championship T-Shirt - Nice my 3rd favorite sports team
Maverick Championship Hat
Rangers World Series T-Shirt - Nice my 2nd favorite sports team
Rangers World Series Hat
Auburn National Championship T-Shirt - Nice my favorite sports team
Auburn National Championship Hat

Three T-Shirts/three hats, three teams that were in the final game of the year. Unfortunately, the Rangers came up short, but Rangers in the world series for the first time ever has to be considered a successful year. Both Auburn football and Mavericks basketball were crowned as the best. So many horrible years of Lakers, Yankees and Alabama titles have made me triple appreciate the year that I had. The sports gods have smiled on me. I like the Cowboys, but I would sacrifice a 0-16 Cowboy season if I could duplicate the Rangers, Auburn, and Mavs years.

This got me to thinking....

I root for Auburn because I am a proud alum. My dad is a proud alum, and my sister is proud alum. I root for the Rangers and Mavericks because I have almost my entire live in the DFW area, and you should root for your home team. This got me to thinking. I'm am going to put together some rules for who you can root for:

1. My Yankees/Lakers rules - You are never allowed to root for a team just because they win a lot. You must have some tie to the team. People always claim that they are from New York or LA....then root for the Mets and the Clippers!

2. My Alabama Rule - If you align yourself with team, you are never allowed to root for their rival. If Alabama suited up against the Taliban football team, I would don my headdress and pray toward Mecca! I heard someone say I root for both Georgia and Auburn. Not possible, at least not week in and week out. Possible exception - When the Bulldogs play the tide, Go Dawgs!

3. My Barkley Rule - When I was 16, Matt, Todd, and I got a chance to meet Charles Barkley on a random encounter at a sporting goods store in Alabama. We saw him and he was the greatest guy ever to us. He was friendly and took the time to chat and joke with us. That said, after that I always rooted for Barkley - Philly, Arizona, Houston, etc. Now I root for the TNT broadcast. He's not without his flaws, but I love the guy. If you have a friend, buddy, etc. you are allowed to switch allegiances to follow him.

3a. My Lebron Corollary - You are not allowed to root for Lebron and Miami. You don't know him. Unless you are rich and famous, he doesn't care about you, a point he made clear after game 6. All of the "regular" folks who have to wake up in our own miserable non rich worlds are never allowed to root for him!

4. My UTA/UAB Rule - If you went to small college and don't specifically root for any team, you are not allowed to celebrate the losses of others. Any time that Auburn loses, I can count on about 5 phone calls from some idiots that don't have a team. Unless you feel the joy/pain of a particular team, you are not allowed to dance on the graves of other people's teams. A die hard Bama fan is allowed to say, "Auburn Sucks" because they know that college sports are a huge boomerang and it will come back next year, but that is how it works. If you don't really care who wins or loses a game, then continue to not care when my team loses.

5. My Persistance Rule - Once you declare a team, you are stuck with them. You can't root for them and support them when they are good and ignore them when they are bad. There are a few exceptions. Dad jumped ship on the Cowboys when they fired Landry...I kinda understand.

Fact is, the most popular teams and players are those that win, because people are stupid. I can't stand the Yankee fans, Laker fans, Red Sox fans, Kobe fans, Lebron fans (wait he doesn't win, ignore that one), Tiger Woods fans, etc. These fans sure do get quiet when their teams are losing. I bet you don't see too many Tiger Woods fans right now. That bandwagon lost a wheel. The Lebron fans have been quiet for a couple weeks. Quick shout out to the Cubs fans...what a loyal fan base for such a miserable team.

You can put this on the record. I never liked Michael Jordan. I never liked Tiger Woods. I never liked Shaq. As a kid I rooted for the Lakers, but I grew up. Teams that I have always rooted against: Miami Hurricanes, Oklahoma, Notre Dame, the Yankees, The Celtics, Ohio State, USC.

I tend to root against the "popular" teams. I stick with DFW teams and Auburn. Everyone else can lose for all I care.

Lentor

I grew up Baptist and the idea of Lent was foreign to me. Carrie grew up Methodist and traditionally denies herself something for Lent each year. This year, I was with a crew of folks that had all decided to give something up. This is where I got the title of "Lentor" Patrick summed it up best so I will steal his words:

"As an aside, the term Lentor was coined at a birthday dinner when a friend had a question about not swearing. A different friend quickly intervened, heading off any moral quandary and designating himself as a Lentor, one who can determine the applicable boundaries of a Lenten sacrifice. I’m sure a priest could have served the role, but what lay person wouldn’t want to help set some tangible, real world spiritual chalk lines?"

It was fun having spirited discussion on whether or not it was permissible for someone giving up fried foods to have pan fried chicken (I ruled that it was not OK to have pan fried foods). I like having the power to make decisions over the lives of others. I think I am going to start arbitrarily judging others.

For example, effective immediately, I will begin to judge who has the best comment on Facebook statuses. I will also rule as to who has the worst! The winners/losers will only come from those that are on my friends list, and I may choose not to issues a ruling if there aren't enough comments. I will also be keeping score. There are rules to. Any LOL or other dumb acronyms or happy faces made with colons will automatically be up for worst comment and can never win best comment. I'll be keeping score folks, so choose your words carefully!

Here is a list of my Lentor rulings:

1. For someone who gave up cussing - Could not flip people off, can not say "BS" or "SOB", Shoot/Dang were permitted.
2. For someone who gave up fried foods - Could not eat pan fried foods. Any time that oil was added, it became illegal. Bacon, even though fried in a pan is OK, because oil wasn't added.
3. For someone who gave up deserts - Milkshake with a meal are OK. Milkshakes after the meal are no OK, they become a desert.
4. For someone who gave up Facebook - You can't update your status, even if you break up with your boyfriend and Facebook has you in a relationship
5. I ruled against the "it is OK on Sundays deal" Lent loses its power if you can "cheat" every seventh day. I say you maintain it the whole time.


BW

Second Chance

Don't you always wonder how many chances SHOULD someone get? Does everyone deserve a second chance? What about a third? This is one issue with this country. We keep giving people more chances. At some point, we have to identify people as the kind of guy/girl that cannot play by society's rules. For example, Charles Manson was in jail multiple times, twice for rape, and several times for theft, yet he kept being released. You probably know the rest, he led a group that went on a killing rampage. What if they would have kept him in jail after his third or fourth arrest. They didn't, and a bunch of folks died.

Here is what brings me to this.....Last week, someone entered a local church beat up a 60 yr. old lady almost to death, then killed the preacher. This idiot robbed a church. Here is the guy they arrested:

Oct. 2010 - aggravated assault with a deadly weapon
May 2010 - aggravated assault with a deadly weapon
2008 - Theft (note, there were no crimes between 2008-2010, he was in jail)
2007 - Theft (note, there wasn't much activity in 2006, he spent most of that time in jail)
2005 - unauthorized use of a vehicle

This guy committed five major crimes in 6 years, and he was in jail about half of that time. My question is why do we keep letting him out? Now he is again in jail for capital murder. He is accused of killing a preacher and almost killing a 60 yr. old lady in a church! This just makes me nuts. If only we would have locked him up for more than 4 months following his second conviction for assault with a deadly weapon, these two victims would be alive today. By the way, following his second conviction in less than a year for aggravated assault with a deadly weapon, he got 8 months probation. 8 months probation.........wow! Gotta love our "justice" system. Maybe this time, he will get a stiff fine and have to pick up trash for a couple weeks!

2011

I looked back at many of my old posts and realize that too many of them begin with comments on how long it has been between posts. No now, I say, forget you, no more apologies. If it takes a while, then so be it.

As I read my last post, I was a contract employee. That has changed. One day the VP showed up on a scheduled visit. He barely said hello, before he had a job offer for me. The money was right and I already know the company, so it was easy. I am still working on that huge project that I started in October, so I got my fingers crossed on that one. If it goes through, it will be a 10 year government contract supporting our military folks overseas.

Shifting Gears

As most people probably know, I am a proud Auburn alum. I live to watch Auburn football. Needless to say, I am on top of the world after the game last week. NATIONAL CHAMPS! I've done a real good job soaking it all in, reading everything and enjoying every second. It was 53 years since the last championship, so I may not live to see the next one, but the good news is this: I GOT TO SEE THIS ONE. THIS YEAR. 2010 PERFECT SEASON!

As many read the previous paragraph, they are already forming an insult directed at Auburn, or Cam Newton. I don't really get these people. They see happiness in others, and instead of sharing the happiness, they try to bring them down. I said recently, that I was on top of the world after the game. The first response I got was, "what are you going to do when they take the national championship away?" What is going on a person's life where they have to be the one to rain on a parade.

Hey look there is a happy person, let's go punch him in the gut and bring him down to our miserable level. Let's go to the women's hospital and talk to the women that just gave birth and tell them how many kids die young! There is no way we can let others enjoy life. Go sit outside a wedding chapel and talk about how many marriages end in divorce, OR you can just be happy.

So once again, forget you, my team one and you can't take that away from me!

Been Too Long

Well, sounds weird, but I've deliberately avoiding the blog. In some small way, I feel like I am narrating my life, while keeping everyone up to date. Not that people care, but I also like to look back in time to see what my thought were as things happened.

I've been avoiding this, because I had to reveal that I lost my job recently. I really didn't tell anyone because I hate the look people give you, and I hate that every conversation thereafter begins with, "so how's the job search?" I know people are asking because they are concerned, but when it is going bad, you get taken down a notch every time they ask. If you get asked multiple times, that's multiple notches, and I like the notch I'm on now and would prefer to get to a previous notch up not the other way.

Before you clowns all call and ask, I am working now and have been for a couple weeks. I took a contract job. It pays OK, but there may or may not be long term opportunity. I'm working on a big project (several hundred million $$$$$). If it goes well, there will most likely be opportunity, especially to those that contributed. If not, then I will probably be let got.

Other Stuff:

Emily had her first ER visit this weekend. That is a horrible experience. Carrie and I talked and strangely, the 7 hour visit didn't seem that long. Clearly the hard part is watching your baby hurt. Turns out that she had a Urinary Tract Infection (UTI). I'm told that this is not uncommon amongst girls. I've never had one, so I don't have any perspective on the discomfort, but I can't imagine that it isn't fun.

I'll post about the whole ordeal once it is over. Today, she is still upset and doesn't stray too far from mom.

Helmets Continued

Shortly after my fall, I took about two minutes to figure out where I was. I don't think that I was fully concussed, but my bell was definitely rung. Then, I jumped back on the bike and continued. Every few minutes, the whole crew would stop and make sure that everyone was still on track. When they saw me, they had quite a laugh.

In all, the trail is about 10 miles. I made it five miles in and our group of seven turned into a group of four. Three others turned around early. About half way back to the start, I look down to see that my front tire was flat, and it was starting to get dark. Great!

I walked it in and took some more clever insults from my buddies. All this said, I think I am going back in two weeks. With a helmet.

Once I got home, my ear was in need of cleaning. I jumped into the shower and rinsed off as much as I could. Then I asked Carrie to clean my ear with peroxide. She did a great job, but there was one area she didn't clean. A small chunk of my ear had dirt underneath it. She just couldn't do it. By the way, I hope you don't have to feel the pain of someone rubbing a Q-Tip on a messed up ear...it hurts.

Then, I had to call my mom. Mom can do anything. She came over with a whole kit of first aid supplies. She laid me down on the couch and went to work. She pulled back the chunk of my ear and cleaned inside. By the way, that hurts. All this said, I am very thankful to have friends that think enough of me to invite me mountain biking. I am thankful for a wife that watched my baby and let me go, and did as much first aid as she could handle. Finally, I am thankful that my mom drops everything to come over at 9:00 at night to fix me up.

Helmets Are For Wimps

Tonight some friends from work invited me out to go mountain biking. I've never been mountain biking, but it sounded fun. By the way, I haven't been on my bicycle in around 10 years. Again, sounds like fun. Riding a bike is like, well, riding a bike.

As we all meet up at the trails, I notice that everyone has two things that I don't. Helmets and water. I understand the water, and I just forgot. Next time I will surely bring a water bottle. I grew up riding bikes. My brother and I probably logged 1000 miles on our bikes as children. Mom and dad would give us a ride to some places but the majority of our travel to school, the pool, the park, or to friends houses was on our bikes. All of this riding, and I never wore a helmet. Helmets are for wimps. Also, I consider myself a bicycle expert - mostly based on my experience as a child.

The trail started kinda rough. It took me a while to get used to the gears and the braking, but I quickly got into form. There are a couple of accomplished riders and they take off and get way ahead of us. I settled into the middle of the pack. I wasn't the slowest nor the fastest. About 10 minutes into the ride, DK, the guy that organized this ride, wiped out right in front of me. I made sure he was OK, then I pointed and laughed. Apparently, when mountain biking, wipeouts are very common. We stopped and (they) got some water. We chatted and laughed at DK for a moment, then took off again.

Right when we took off, there was a giant downhill slope that was all gravel. The slope was so steep that I had to lean back in my seat and ride low to avoid flipping over the handle bars and I zoomed up the other side. All of the fast riders were on top of the hill to see who had the guts to attempt to ride down this hill. This guy did!

A couple minutes later, there was another steep hill and I again zoomed down it...no problem. Then with all of my accumulated speed, I climbed up the other side...problem. Right at the top of the incline, there was a large tree root, so I was just going to jump it! Well, that didn't happen. My front tire hit the root and stopped. Problem is, I was still moving. I flipped over my handle bars. When you ride, most of your upper body weight is on your hands, so when you flip over, your hands are under you and there is nothing to break the fall. Well, nothing except the top your head. The first part of my body to hit the ground was my head, just over my right eyebrow. Then my right knee, right shoulder and finally right ear. That's right, my right ear:




Be sure to check out the ol' blog tomorrow to read the rest.

Father's Day

As Father's Day approaches, I took a second to reflect on being a dad.

I know it is impossible to believe, but there was a time in my life when I wasn't the best athlete around. My freshman year of high school, I went out for the freshman basketball team at Southwest High School. I made the B team. The B team is for the the 13th-24th best players. Unfortunately, the B team only plays a few games each season. After our B season, ended, I was good enough to be called up the to show! I was put on the A team. (not he cool one with the van). My dad went to every game. (back info, my Dad hates basketball). While on the A team, I never got to play. Literally, there was a stretch of several games that I never played a minute but my dad was always in the stands.

One time I told my dad not to come to the game that night. The game was an hour away and I hadn't been playing. I remember it like it was yesterday, he told me that he was going to be at every game because he wouldn't miss me getting on the floor. Well, that night, I didn't get a chance to play and my dad was up in the stands. He paid the two bucks to enter the gym, drove an hour away and watched me sit on the bench hoping to play, but he was there. By the end of my freshman year, I played a few games and became a capable backup post player, and he was there.

Just to feed my ego, I want to tell you that I worked my way to a starter by the end of my sophmore year on the JV team at Southwest then ultimately made the all district team at Crowley High.

Whenever I think back at all the thousands of things my dad did for me, the top of the list is always his attendance to a sport that he doesn't like, to watch me sit on the bench just in case I got a chance to play. I know that no matter what Emily does for fun, I won't miss a game, match or meet. Let's just hope she plays a sport that I understand. Swimming, Volleyball, or Basketball.

Thanks Dad,

BW

Growing

We're in Trouble

Saturday night, I got to see a old buddy. You know, the kind you don't see for two years, but when you do, it was like only a day or two had passed.

Before I go, I had to stop by the gas station and gas up. While in line to pay, the lady in front of me was asking the cashier for some cigarettes. First about her. Short, young, and overweight. The cashier carded her for cigarettes, so she looked like a late teenager maybe young twenties. Her order: Marlboro Reds, two boxes. After getting her ID back, she slides her credit card in the machine and it gets rejected. She acted like there was something wrong with the machine and tried again. Rejected again. She looks at the cashier as he shrugs his shoulders. Then she grabs a second card! Swipes and and shocker...rejected. So she tries it again and again it was rejected. Then she leaves with her smokes still on the checkout counter.

In this day of healthcare debate and taxes on the rich and such, I learned a lesson from this girl. You can't fix stupid! If you have zero dollars in your account and are over you credit limit, do you need to be spending $11 on cigarettes at a convenience store? Let's break it down.

1. She's overweight, clearly she was not taking care of herself physically. Especially considering her age. Are you ever going to have more free time to exercise than you do at that age, and is it ever easier?

2. She's a smoker. Probably not helping item #1 by the way. I don't really have an issue with people that smoke as long as it isn't around me. I think it is nasty, but don't we all have a habit that someone else thinks is nasty? I wonder if she read the warnings on the side? Isn't that the solution to our healthcare problem...warning labels?

3. She's out of money. Not only is she out of money, she is clearly living on credit cards and credit card debt. If she was to shred those cards and live on cash, she'd know that she was out of money. More concerning is that I'm sure she knew that she was low on money, yet she had $11 to spend on smokes. Not milk, or bread or diapers or soup, but smokes! So, she is mounting debt and wasting money.

4. She is shopping at a convenience store. About a quarter mile away is a giant Wal Mart (with significantly lower prices), yet she chose the most expensive place to shop. Maybe this feeds into #3. I've never priced cigarettes, but I'd be willing to bet they are much cheaper at Wal Mart than Shell. Any bets?

What I quickly realized is that this girl is most likely in poor health (or soon will be) and has no money...HELLO HEALTHCARE, and HELLO TAXES! There are tons of people out there who make responsible decisions that just need a little help, but this girl just feeds my cynicism. How can I gladly pay my taxes, when I know people like her are taking them to buy smokes at Shell? Maybe she does deserve healthcare, but what if her health problems are self imposed? Should I have to ante up for that?

Maybe in my land of rainbows and unicorns, she left the Shell and said, "what am I doing?" Shortly after that, she threw away all her cigarettes and lighters and such. Then she used the money once wasted on smokes at Shell and started paying down her credit card debt. She also started walking 2 miles 4 times/week. Two years later, she was down 35 lbs. and paid off, then shredded her credit cards. Good For Her!

You write the end of this story...I want to, but don't believe my ending.

I'm Right! You're Wrong!

I was listening to two people argue over some political stuff (we've all done it). Then I realized that nothing ever gets accomplished in these arguments. Just to make the point, find someone with an opposing viewpoint on abortion. Now I have heard lots of people argue opposing sides of this subject many times, and after the first such argument, I have never heard a new thought. Yeah, it's still the woman's body, and yeah, it's a living thing. Then why do we argue these things. Have you ever known anyone to say, "wait, you're right, abortion is wrong! I am against it now." No, nobody has ever changed their viewpoint..at least not based on your thoughts (things can happen in their own life that alters their beliefs).

One day I was watch that silly new show, The Marriage Ref. It is dumb show that will be quickly cancelled, but it does have an interesting idea. Choose a winner! So I decided to make some rules to decide how to pick a winner of an argument. Here is how to determine the winner:

1. Once it gets to name calling...you lose. Here are some common examples. "you're an idiot", "racist", "loser", etc. At this point it is no longer about the issue, and you've clearly made it personal...you lose.

2. If you tell someone to put their mouth on part of your body. "Eat this ", "kiss that..." for example. Once it gets here, you've ran out of good points.

3. Finally, if it gets to cussing and/or screaming. Pretty self explanatory.

Here are some fun topics to try this out on: Abortion, Death Penalty, Health Care, Religion, Israel vs. Middle East, the bailout, Gay Rights, Welfare, and there are many, many more. Enjoy!

Just Close Your Eyes!

Lately, Emily has been either sleeping great or not at all. Just once, I'd like to crawl in her little head to figure out why she does what she does sometimes. Why does she put everything in her mouth? Yesterday, we couldn't get her to open her mouth for food, but I was playing with her outside and she put a bunch of dirt in her mouth. Why?

Saturday night, she started crying around 11:00 or so. Normally, we let her cry for 5-10 minutes to see if she will put herself back to sleep. About 75% of the time, this works and she will cry for a minute, then fall back asleep. Well, Saturday was the "other" 25%. Once she gets a good cry going, it is hard to listen to. She sounds like she is in such pain. Like she was sleeping on a bed of fire ants.

I walked into her her room and she was rolling around in her bed just screaming. I picked her up and held her to my chest to comfort her. Most of the time, she'll quickly calm down as she is being held. Most of the time... This night was different. As I held her, she would kick me and push herself away from me with her legs and scream. Then, I would move her legs and pull her in again, but she would push with her arms and legs (trying to get free?) I never could get her under control and had to call in the big guns. Carrie. For whatever reason, when Emily gets completely out of control, only mom can soothe her. So I bring her to Carrie and a few minutes later, Emily is asleep.

Now I can't sleep. I am a bit upset that I'm not what she wants. I understand that babies always have a natural bond with mom, but I want some of that too. As my mind wonders, I think to myself:

"The sad part of all of this, is when she is older, she won't realize the sacrifice of time, money and sleep. She will be upset with me because I told her to change her clothes to something more appropriate. She will be upset because her curfew isn't where she wants it. I just wish that I could video all of these moments when we are up late on a Saturday night and all we want to do is calm her down and let her sleep peacefully. Let me record Carrie changing her sheets at 4:00 in the morning because she threw up in her bed. Fact is, we will never get full credit for these moments, nor should be expect credit. We aren't raising this girl for credit."

Then I got a backfire....Do I appreciate my parents enough, because they did these same things for me. Having a kid gives you perspective on a lot of things, but strangely, I got perspective on sacrifices made 36 years ago through a 7 month old baby. Thanks Mom, Thanks Dad.

OH NO!

As I hold baby Emily, I catch a whiff of unpleasantness. Carrie won't be home for at least 30 mintues, so I guess I'm on my own on this one. She is in a very good mood, so this shouldn't take but a second.

I pick her up and set her on her changing table, a small dresser about 3 feet high with a changing pillow on top of it, and all of her gear in a basket (wipes, diapers, powder, etc.) I pull off her shoes and pants and see that we have a "problem." Seems that Emily scored a victory over Mr. Pampers, and consequently over Mr. Onsie too. I realize now that I am going to have to strip her down and change all of her clothes. So I get the messy diaper off, and reach for the wipes....none left.

What do you do, when you have a half naked baby with poop all over the place and no wipes? Well, the wipes are in the closet about 5 feet away...do you see a bad idea forming in my head? I take one giant step toward the closet and grab the wipes and return to the table....wrong box. This box of wipes has clothes that she has outgrown. So I again take one giant step toward the closet locate the wip....OH NO, the baby rolling off the changing table!

I dove across the room and reached her just as she hit the floor. I was able to catch "most" of her, but she still took a bump. Did she break anything? Does she have a concussion? Is she breathing? All of this worry creeps up on me. Luckily, I caught enough of her that there wasn't even a bruise. She cried for about 30 seconds, probably more from my reaction than the fall. If I didn't feel bad enough, now I have poop all over me, her and the floor. I finally got everything cleaned up and she quickly returned to a very happy baby. As for me, I just want to apologize to her and have her say, "no big deal, I'm good."

As a parent, you are not allowed an off day or even an off second. I can only imagine what happens when they start walking.

All kinds of stuff

I guess this is my blog and I can post whatever I want. If you don't like it, then you can just be wrong.

1. Carrie turned in her two week notice this week and will go to part time starting the middle of April. I know that it will make things easier on her and ultimately will be better for Emily. I am just amazed at the pink mafia. There are tons of "good for you" and "it's best" type comments. Exactly how do they know? If I was to announce that I was quitting my job to take care of the kid, I can guarantee there would be lots of raised eyebrows. Why the double standard?

2. I realized this week that nothing is more polarizing that politics! I read through several arguments of people for/against the healthcare bill. One thing that I read a lot is that it is the "right thing to do", and that it "only affects the rich".

I believe that it is hard to take a moral stand for something that costs you nothing. The true beauty of giving is the sacrifice. If you will remember, David was going to create an alter to God and a man wanted to donate the land to David and the wood and supplies too. David refuesed and said, "[I will not] offer burn offerings to the Lord my God with that which costs me nothing" (2 Samuel 24:24)


If you truly believe that it is "the right thing to do" then how much are YOU willing to pay? If the answer is zero, then the double standard is revealed. If it is right, then you should willingly give! If you believe that the right thing to do is to give blood, yet you have never given, how much should I listen? If you believe it is right to give money to those without healthcare and you haven't given to these people, how much should I listen?

This is one thing that I struggle with. I know that I should be compassionate. I know that I should help others, and I know that I don't do enough. Truth is, we are ALL rich! If you are reading this on a computer or cell phone, then you are rich! (just ask the people in Haiti) It is just more comfortable to say "the rich" and define them as people who make more than me, fact is, I got a house, two cars, a computer, two TVs....I got more than most and chances are so do you. Should I give willingly, or should I wait for government legislation forcing me to give, or even better, shoud I support a bill that forces others to give! Even better?

3. One more healthcare bill note. Part of the bill will require all restaurant with more than 20 locations to print the calorie count on the menu, because this will improve healthy eating....hmmmmm. How did this work for warnings on cigarettes? How did this work for warning on beer/alcohol? Fact is, government can't save us from us. People are lazy and cheeseburgers are easy. By now, if you don't know that a bacon cheeseburger is bad for you, you got bigger issues. Of course it is, but I can drive through and get one and it tastes good.

I would love to know your thoughts on these things. If you have intelligent, well thought out comments, feel free to leave them. (remember, ignorance will be censored!)

March Madness

It's been a few weeks since the marathon and I've told the story of my run to dozens of people now. Most people agree that finishing a marathon is a monumental feat and the time doesn't matter. I agree....for other people. Had I been able to jog the whole thing or been able to give it my all, I would be happy, but I was hindered by something that I have never had to face. Cramps and dehydration ruled my run, not fatigue. Therefore, I am getting ready for another marathon. Not sure when or where, but I gotta do one to satisfy myself.

Since the marathon, I have been sick three separate times, so training has been slow, plus we got snow...again. Exactly how does this global warmining thing work? Hopefully, I'll be able to kick this last bout and get out running again soon. I know Banjo is getting stir crazy in this house, she needs to run!

Emily is growing a developing. She has started to crawl which isn't a good of a thing as I thought. It just means that we have to keep an closer eye on her now. She can get from one end of hte room to the other in a hurry. Hope everyone is doing good. I'll try to write more again soon.

Done!

The last stretch of the marathon seemed to be the easiest. AP rejoined me to go across the line. There was the final left turn, then you could see hundreds of people on both sides of the street cheering, laughing, and enjoying a perfect day. AP points out Carrie and Emily. They wave, smile and take pictures. By now, my legs are on fire and I've been trying to run on my heels so my calf would stay stretched. (notice the picture. You can tell I am running funny to accommodate my calf.)

When the finish line was visible, you could see the crowd, you could see the large balloon arch, and you could see the finish line. At that point, I really felt like I was going to cry. I don't know if it was from the physical pain, or the emotional joy, or countless things in between. Because I am too proud, I held back and made a mean face, because I am a MAN. Maybe I'll punch a wall later!

I crossed the line, the announcer said my name and I FINISHED! Just as I crossed, a nice lady says congratulations and puts a medal over my head. Carrie and crew came over, congratulated AP and me as we all walked to get free stuff. As a finisher, I got a nice shirt, and a bag of samples and stuff. AP tried to get me to go to the medical tent to get an IV of fluids, but again I am too proud. I've earned this pain and I've earned this hurt.

Notice the picture, not a drop of sweat on me, AP is wet and shiny, I'm dry as a bone! I finished a marathon. I was good enough to realize that I can do it, but bad enough where I gotta do another and keep it together.

Random Marathon Things:

* There are hundreds of volunteers that make this race possible. People handing out water, people handing out medals, and countless other that help you through all 26.2

* There are dozens of people along the route that are just well wishers. Not associated with the marathon, but people who live along the route that root for and encourage everyone.

* Running with a partner is the best thing you can do to run a marathon

* Running with a partner is the worst thing you can do to run a marathon

* Having family and friends to support me is the only way I could have realistically made it. A friendly face along the way is better than a strong wind at your back (but I would prefer both)

* There is no chance that the weather could ever be that perfect on race day.

* If you ever run one, wear the shirt the next day. I got a couple of extra, "congrats" at lunch and at the grocery store on Sunday.

* I'm not sure I whether I would have finished without AP, but either way, I was glad to have him. He was both a coach and a friend on the course. He served our country in Iraq, so he was already a hero to us all, but he was my personal hero Saturday.

If anyone is in the mood to run one, I can't encourage you enough. Provided you do the training and have realistic goals for yourself, it is a life goal that can be crossed off and never taken away. I feel like a boxer that got beat up for 12 rounds, but got hooked on the sport! I'm running again tomorrow...6 miles. Wanna run?

Miles 20-26.0

AP and I said goodbye to the wives and my sister and headed north to the finish line. This stretch included some really pretty parks. Almost all of the run was along blacktop or concrete, but there was a stretch along a paved trail in a park. Luckily, there was not very many people running with us because the path was narrow and there was a dropoff to get around people.

At this point AP looks over at me and says, "Brad, you're not sweating anymore." For those of you who have played sports with me know that nobody sweats like I do. I rubbed my forehead and it was like sandpaper with salt, but very dry. Also at this time, I started seeing spots. When I would look at something white or shiny (like a street sign), the image of it would last for several seconds like I had image burn in. I'm not doctor, but that can't be good.

I feel like the spots were a result of low blood sugar. I ate a light pasta dinner Friday night and skipped breakfast that morning. This stretch is around 12:30-1:15, so I had gone 18 hours with no food other than jellybeans and GU. Maybe the decision to not eat was a bad one. I was so scared of an ugly "bathroom" incident that I wanted a clean system before I ran.

Clearly the lack of sweating was a result of dehydration. I just couldn't replace fluids at the rate I was losing them. I drank 1-3 cups of water at every water station (and there were about 20), but clearly I need more. There is one more common issue that accompanies dehydration....cramping. Suddenly, I start hopping on my left leg as my right calf clenches up. At one point, I don't stretch out the cramp just to show AP, there was a deep "hole" in my calf from the back of my knee down to my upper Achilles area where the muscle just tensed up. For the rest of the race, I could no longer jog more than 60 seconds without stretching my right calf.

In all my days swimming, playing basketball, volleyball, and all my training runs, I've never had a cramp...ever. I proudly stated that I never stretch, because I never needed too. Well, leg cramps are for real! So now I am trying to run more on my heels to force stretching as I run. Sadly, I couldn't enjoy the downhill part of the race. When running downhill, you don't stretch your calf, because the slope reduces the stretch, so I cramped up more during the "easy" part.

Meanwhile, I am trying to stretch every 60 seconds, and AP is really wanting to go. He is still staying with me. I can only imagine how frustrated I would be with someone if I was being slowed by them to this extent, but he wouldn't desert me. I must have said it 10 times, "just go ahead, I'll be OK." - I lied. By now, I was carrying a Gatorade bottle that we would fill up at every water station, but I was too hobbled to carry it, so AP was carrying it for me. If you carry a half full bottle, the water sloshes and makes it twice as heavy. Not usually a big deal, unless you are 23 miles into a run.

Finally, AP and I limp past the 25 mile mark, 1.2 miles to go and he finally takes off without me. I was fine on my own. At this point, we we in downtown and you could see the crowds start to cheer for you. Then I get to the 26th mile. 0.2 miles left.

The last .2 miles and post race next....

Miles 13.1-20

It's all down hill from here.....

Even though 13.1 is the technical half way point, we are still heading south. Right at mile 13.5, I look ahead and see a nasty hill. I know you think it may be topographically impossible, but these 7 miles were all uphill, even though we crossed the turn around point. To me, the half way point is when you start moving toward the finish line this is the "turn around point." - about mile 17.5. Mile 13.5 and mile 20 are the same point, as you loop back. It is also very depressing to see people run past you. Those guys are 6.5 miles ahead of me!

After mile 17.5, we are heading back to the finish line. At this point, I am only running every other minute. I would jog 60 seconds then walk 60 seconds. Somewhere prior to hitting the TCU campus, we saw a bunch of frat boys handing out tiny cans of beer. What kind of idiot would drink a beer while running a marathon? So I grabbed one! AP told me that it was a horrible idea, but I couldn't' pass up the comedy of the situation. I'm running 26.2 miles and toward the end, I thought how funny it would be to blog that I drank an 8 oz beer. I managed a swallow, maybe two before I realized that AP was right...horrible idea. Not only does it not satisfy your thirst, the carbonation blows up in your stomach. I am now tired, sore, hot, sweaty, and am either going to burp or throw up! Luckily, I was able to burp out all of that air and then I quickly tossed the beer out. Actually, AP carefully placed the beer on one of the cones that guarded us from traffic.

Comedy aside, I'm really deteriorating. Toward the end of this stretch, I have surpassed my longest training run, and I can tell. I'm really starting to break down. AP is a rock, he is encouraging me and all but carrying me to each mile as I beg him to "just go on, I'll be OK"

As we approach mile 20 we see the Carrie and Emily again. This time the AP and Brad posse has grown by 2, AP's wife, and my sister. Apparently, there was some fun at my expense. My sister reminded me that I said, "I really don't you understand just how bad I feel." - not a typo.

Miles 20-26 coming soon.